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 Post subject: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2021 11:14 am 
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I'm a big fan when CFNM is more platonic and the sexual tension is less apparent. Something casual that is seemingly innocent.

I never liked to associate CFNM with femdom or embarrassment. If anything I think of CFNM as somewhat of an alpha-male situation. A man with the highest of confidence and lack of care to be able to go naked without any consequences to me is a very attractive feature.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Mar 15, 2021 3:21 pm 
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Hey blaze3264,
I totally agree. I have had several of those and they turned out to be amazing fun over time. All but one were girls from my cycling team. Our cycling kits are skintight and the Polyester/Lycra fabric becomes even more see-through when sweaty and wet, depending on the color.

And many times when we ride with the girls we get changed, shower and pee in front of eachother; so it lends itself to very liberal openness and we become friends as we're cycling hard up mountains and long 100-mile rides with a lot of trash talk but also us stronger male riders dropping back and helping / drafting for the female riders.

I promise to write more details, specifically about one or two of my platonic female cycling buddies when I have more time.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Tue Mar 16, 2021 3:13 pm 
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steve-o wrote:
Hey blaze3264,
I totally agree. I have had several of those and they turned out to be amazing fun over time. All but one were girls from my cycling team. Our cycling kits are skintight and the Polyester/Lycra fabric becomes even more see-through when sweaty and wet, depending on the color.

And many times when we ride with the girls we get changed, shower and pee in front of eachother; so it lends itself to very liberal openness and we become friends as we're cycling hard up mountains and long 100-mile rides with a lot of trash talk but also us stronger male riders dropping back and helping / drafting for the female riders.

I promise to write more details, specifically about one or two of my platonic female cycling buddies when I have more time.
What you are talking about sounds like NFNM or naturist activities surely?


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Tue Mar 16, 2021 7:05 pm 
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Sorry for the confusion. I was only trying to explain how we all became platonic friends and used to seeing each other in different types of situations, as context before writing more when I have time.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sat Mar 20, 2021 9:09 am 
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One person naked (male??) and another clothed (female). that is by definition a power relationship.
Two persons naked describes nudism.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sat Mar 20, 2021 10:44 am 
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semchan3 wrote:
One person naked (male??) and another clothed (female). that is by definition a power relationship.


When I am naked with clothed females in a consensual situation, it is exactly where I want to be. I feel empowered.

I find it even better when the female(s) involved feel empowered too.

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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Wed Apr 07, 2021 11:42 am 
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doug444 wrote:
semchan3 wrote:
One person naked (male??) and another clothed (female). that is by definition a power relationship.


When I am naked with clothed females in a consensual situation, it is exactly where I want to be. I feel empowered.

I find it even better when the female(s) involved feel empowered too.


I agree. Clothed doesn't always have to indicate power. I think most consentual cfnm situations are about being equal and free.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Fri Apr 09, 2021 11:33 am 
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I've pondered this scenario for years. The challenge I've always had is that people have differing definition of the word "platonic". And whenever someone says "Well, to me the word means...yadda yadda", that only confuses the situation because individuals are wrongfully using words if they solely rely upon their own perception as to the meaning of that word.

If one reads the various definitions, the term "platonic" , which is derived by teachings of Plato (although he never used that term) is not related to the word "casual" in any manner. They have entirely different meanings.

If one ascribes to the truest meaning of "platonic love", then there also is a dissociation of those feeling with the other's gender, ergo, platonic should not be associated with "CFNM" as the latter establishes a gender relationship. As it is defined, in platonic love carnal desires of the body are replaced with the "truest" form of love, and that is love of the soul. So effectively, the term "platonic" is more closely aligned with the term "spiritual" as opposed to "casual".

Merriam-Webster's Definition of Platonic

But like any word, over time people begin to use it in contexts of which the creator never envisioned, and the masses then redefine that term. I've seen this happen to "CFNM" as each person that finds interest in it also attempt to redefine it to what they want it to be absent any reference to etymology or how and why it was created.

So we now see the term "platonic" applied to relationships that are void of romance and sex, generally meaning that if a guy has a platonic relationship with a female it can be described best as "just friends" or "the friend zone". And that's okay. My only concern about usage of words is when two people have differing ideas about what it means, yet each doesn't realize the other is talking about something different.

When I coined the term "CFNM", it was never meant to be a subset BDSM, although I would say enjoyment of "humiliation" is a subset of BDSM. But those into BDSM and humiliation will argue vehemently that CFNM is indeed a subset of BDSM. The truth is the reverse...BDSM is just one manner of enjoyment of CFNM because of the power exchange dynamic. But there are others as noted above.

But because of the constant confusion brought on by so many wanting to own the definition of things, I created this web page to set it all straight, as I'm the only one that has a right to claim a greater understanding of the term "CFNM" as I created it:

Defining CFNM

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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Fri May 14, 2021 2:08 pm 
True, OP.

Best CFNM is when the women is either amused or slightly flustered, but not dominating


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sun May 16, 2021 8:28 am 
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I understand as the coolest CFNM that one that is not clearly leading to sex. Or at least, you dont know for sure.
I dont mean that is not exciting. Anything is exciting if you know it will end in a good sex session. But the real way i think in CFNM is that one where maybe is nothing more coming besides the fact of me being exposed to some girl/s. Maybe with a friend you know is not going to be anything else. Maybe with unknown people. Anyway, in any situation, the best thing is to let it flow, and see what happens.

What im not really into at all is in the humiliation stuff. Dont see it like being an alpha male or something like that, but surely CFNM is something i will do for my pleasure as well as the girl will do it for hers. I'd never force someone to see me naked if I don't really know if she wants to (except for the accidental cases) and, in the same way, the situation will never be forced to go to a place i dont want to. I totally respect guys who like to be humiliated, forced and laughed at. But not my cup of tea.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sun May 16, 2021 1:18 pm 
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n/m


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sat May 29, 2021 7:30 pm 
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blaze3264 wrote:
I'm a big fan when CFNM is more platonic and the sexual tension is less apparent. Something casual that is seemingly innocent.

I never liked to associate CFNM with femdom or embarrassment. If anything I think of CFNM as somewhat of an alpha-male situation. A man with the highest of confidence and lack of care to be able to go naked without any consequences to me is a very attractive feature.


While I’m not quite sure that the alpha-male thing makes sense to me, I think you’re totally right when it comes to a guy being confident in his own skin and not really caring if women see him naked or not; this is certainly an important factor to establishing a platonic CFNM relationship. However, she almost has to feel the same way about his nudity for it to be truly platonic in my opinion (i.e., she doesn’t care if he’s wearing clothes or not; it’s a nonfactor in their relationship and the present situation).

To employ an analogy: I meet up with a female friend. I’m wearing shorts, but she’s wearing pants. Neither of us cares that my knees, shins, calves, ankles, etc… are exposed because these parts of the body (especially on a man) aren’t sexualized by our culture. We’re just two friends meeting up. It’s a platonic, non-sexualized relationship. The key in this scenario is culture. If the sexes where reversed, and this was a hundred and fifty years ago in the Victorian Age these parts of a woman’s body would very much be viewed as sexual, and a woman who showed a man her calves might as well have been making an advance to him. On the other hand, there are primitive tribes in the Amazon and in Africa where men walk around completely naked all the time. Sometimes these tribes are visited by female anthropologists, missionaries, and even tourists who are undoubtedly fully clothed. A CFNM situation exists, but it’s completely nonsexual, and potentially even platonic. What changes? Not the state of dress or undress. Culture. Hence, I think true platonic CFNM experiences are extremely difficult to come by in the U.S. today. Our society has hyper-sexualized the human body – particularly the genitals. Maybe if male, casual, public nudity amongst clothed females was more common, as it is in some places in Europe, then this infatuation would dullen over time, but I doubt it would ever become fully inconsequential.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Fri Jun 11, 2021 3:07 am 
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Soprano45 wrote:
True, OP.

Best CFNM is when the women is either amused or slightly flustered, but not dominating

I concur!


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sun Jun 13, 2021 7:55 pm 
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TwilightSkys wrote:
blaze3264 wrote:

Our society has hyper-sexualized the human body – particularly the genitals. Maybe if male, casual, public nudity amongst clothed females was more common, as it is in some places in Europe, then this infatuation would dullen over time, but I doubt it would ever become fully inconsequential.


Well, if cfnm was very common and the human body was not so sexualized (genitals are made for sex btw!) I guess it would be inconsequential indeed, and as a matter of fact, not so exciting for us...


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Fri Jul 02, 2021 1:35 am 
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rookie2021 wrote:
Soprano45 wrote:
True, OP.

Best CFNM is when the women is either amused or slightly flustered, but not dominating

I concur!


Agreed, I've been trying to find some good CFNM stories, but I often see them get very sexual and rapey, which I'm not a huge fan of personally. I much more prefer a more casual type of story with no sexual undertones.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Sun Jul 04, 2021 6:30 pm 
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Zizi_Libre wrote:
TwilightSkys wrote:
blaze3264 wrote:

Our society has hyper-sexualized the human body – particularly the genitals. Maybe if male, casual, public nudity amongst clothed females was more common, as it is in some places in Europe, then this infatuation would dullen over time, but I doubt it would ever become fully inconsequential.


Well, if cfnm was very common and the human body was not so sexualized (genitals are made for sex btw!) I guess it would be inconsequential indeed, and as a matter of fact, not so exciting for us...


I love this idea, and believe that de-sexualizing the human body and its functions are the next step in making sexual functions inconsequential. Men have a capacity to squirt semen, and it is quite natural to squirt it when a man is excited. If women were happy to watch men get hardons and even squirt their semen when they got excited, it would make it easy for men and women to enjoy being naked in front of each other, knowing that men had a need to squirt semen from their penis every once and a while. Squirting into a vagina is one thing, but squirting for anyone to watch is just entertainment. with the man enjoying cumming while the woman enjoyed watching. I would love to see public ejaculations become a normal thing with group exhibitions, allowing women to enjoy seeing a man squirt his seed as he enjoys having people watch him shoot his cum for an audience.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Jul 05, 2021 12:01 am 
I agree, OP.

I think there is something natural in a way about CFNM. Guys have an innate desire to show off for girls. Girls in turn like to watch and select a suitable mate. This voyeur/exhibitionist relationship is a part of the reproductive process for many creatures, us included. I think it goes both ways as well. I think girls like putting on a show for guys, but in a different, more seductive way. For girls, they like to be covered to allow for some amount of mystique. There is a teasing element to their sexuality in that men want to see them naked but can't unless they prove themselves to be a worthy mate. Boys, on the other hand, like being naked in front of girls because it gives them a feeling of power and swagger. It gives girls something to look at and learn about and it gives boys something to be proud of. There is definitely a sexual thrill on both sides of this.

I think hardcore humiliation scenarios completely lack this nuance and excitement that comes from the nature and innocence. With platonic CFNM, there is an unspoken sexual excitement between the male and the female that I would argue is in someway primal.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Jul 05, 2021 4:04 am 
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cfnm25 wrote:
With platonic CFNM, there is an unspoken sexual excitement between the male and the female that I would argue is in someway primal.


Primal is a good word. To me, one important element in CFNM is the conflict between the savage and the civilized. Yes, the male really does want sex - he wants to squirt his semen and 'mark his territory.' He pretty much always has sexual urges running around inside him. It's literally embodied by his body - and especially by that penis he's so happy to put on display.

And let's face it - throughout history (and still too much today) the sight of a naked man is not good news for the women around.

But!

Now it's turned around. 'Civilized' naked man still has those desires, but his nudity isn't a threat. Rather it's his offer of support and companionship and love. And the women's acceptance of that offer seals the deal on a new kind of chivalrous behavior.

But maybe I'm reading too much into it!

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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Jul 05, 2021 4:24 am 
mrrigid wrote:

Primal is a good word. To me, one important element in CFNM is the conflict between the savage and the civilized. Yes, the male really does want sex - he wants to squirt his semen and 'mark his territory.' He pretty much always has sexual urges running around inside him. It's literally embodied by his body - and especially by that penis he's so happy to put on display.

And let's face it - throughout history (and still too much today) the sight of a naked man is not good news for the women around.

But!

Now it's turned around. 'Civilized' naked man still has those desires, but his nudity isn't a threat. Rather it's his offer of support and companionship and love. And the women's acceptance of that offer seals the deal on a new kind of chivalrous behavior.

But maybe I'm reading too much into it!


I don't think you are reading too much into it; I think that was beautifully put, actually. The naked man has connotations of power and lust. There is definitely chivalry in CFNM. In baring himself, the man is offering everything that makes him a man, including the power and lust, in a way that denotes trust and protection. It's like an animal that could destroy and consume her instead choosing to protect her. Chivalry, essentially. The clothed woman represents domestication and civilization, and she is, in a sense, taming him. The "taming" or domesticating of man by woman marks the birth of civilization. It allowed man to create all the wonders that civilization entails. This process was like a naked animal being made man by the clothed women. CFNM is like women taking that power back, as if to say women have the power to revert men back into wild beasts. This may be connected to the prevalence of CFNM in antiquity.


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 Post subject: Re: Platonic and Casual
PostPosted: Mon Jul 26, 2021 12:10 pm 
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Parker wrote:
I understand as the coolest CFNM that one that is not clearly leading to sex. Or at least, you dont know for sure.
I dont mean that is not exciting. Anything is exciting if you know it will end in a good sex session. But the real way i think in CFNM is that one where maybe is nothing more coming besides the fact of me being exposed to some girl/s. Maybe with a friend you know is not going to be anything else. Maybe with unknown people. Anyway, in any situation, the best thing is to let it flow, and see what happens.


Exactly!

Some of my fondest CFNM times were visiting a friend I'll call Ann who lived 4 hours away in another state. Ann, I, and the woman that would become my wife (Debbie) met in an online chat room. However I used to visit Ann before meeting Debbie in real life, and we were like best buds... nothing sexual. I really didn't want to ruin our friendship with sex. I'm sure everyone thought Ann and I were bonking.. hell even Debbie asked me about it a few times, but the truth was we were just friends. She knew I was a nudist and always gave me the freedom to be nude in her house (except when others were there). We slept together multiple times but never went past a cuddle. Although I do have to admit her nearness and warmth got me hard a few times and I ended up poking her while we spooned.

After my wife and I got married I wasn't sure how if my (un)dress code would change, but on the first visit I found out. We went there for New Years and after arriving, greetings, and unpacking, the women hung out in the kitchen and I camped out in front of the TV. Being clothed started to bug me so I went back to our room, stripped out of my clothes and tied a sarong on. I figured if I had to wear clothes I'd be as comfortable as I could be. I went to the kitchen to get a beer and Ann said "what the hell is this? You're usually naked 5 minutes after you get here". My wife laughed and added, "yeah, whats up? you NEVER wear clothes at home." I checked if they meant it, and they replied yes so I took the sarong off and spent the rest of the time nude until we went out for the evening. I also spent most of the of the weekend nude and they both acted like it was the most normal thing in the world. I only had to dress once when Ann's daughter came over.

We've been back a few times since then and I'm always naked. Ann and I don't sleep together anymore, but the 3 of us did spend a few evenings watching TV in her bed... me in the middle undressed for comfort and my two favorite women in the world on either side of me.

Ain't nothing wrong with more sexual CFNM.. hell I watch a lot of it in porn, but for me I prefer everyday situations where I just happen to be undressed and in the company of clothed women.


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