CFNM Parties - Games & Activities

General Advice about CFNM Party Games and Activities

Breaking the ice

All parties run the risk of quickly growing stale when attendees don't know each other and feel awkward as they try to fit in.  But when you combine this with the startling experience of meeting a person of the opposite gender for the first time and either you or they are completely naked, that awkwardness can intensify and become uncomfortable.   A good hostess saves the day by using ice-breaking activities to warm things up.  When such a hostess focuses upon activities that create a shared experience, there is a binding effect on guests that result in more fluid conversation and less awkwardness.   This increases everyone's enjoyment while forging friendships.  Even for CFNM parties where people are meeting for the first time, that awkwardness begins to fade and the unique and wonderfully weird environment wherein all women are clothed and all men are naked becomes more comfortable, if not fitting for everyone's enjoyment.   Taken from either those women that have had successful CFNM parties, or, what women have communicated that they would want to experience at one, we have compiled a list of various games and activities to help catalyze the comfortable fun at your party that CFNM is capable of providing.

Recognize what type of CFNM party you and your guests want

"If you've seen one CFNM party, you've seen....well, one CFNM party." Just as it is for all parties, CFNM parties can vary considerably based upon the interests of the women hosting (and yes, they should always have women assisting if not orchestrating their planning and organization), and, the women attending as guests.  CFNM parties range from tame to insane; from mild to wild.   Many women that are experiencing a CFNM party for the first time may be nervous and concerned about being surrounded by a bevy of completely naked men and thus more mild "vanilla" activities may be warranted.  Alternatively, some women have a clear idea about what they want to experience, which may be a bit saucy for the neophyte, and their interests should also be considered during the planning.    Thus, the group of women planning an event must balance the agenda to meet the attendees expectations while also assuring all women attending feel secure within whatever comfort zone they may have.

CFNM versus CFnm - Knowing the Difference - It is important to note again that there are two very different varieties of CFNM parties, and we provide a detailed discussion on the origins and purposes of these very different varieties on our FAQs page.   The first version, generically called "CFNM" (all letters capitalized) was the one this author and others envisioned when we created the concept and term while hosting the first CFNM parties in the 1990s.   In this version, the nudity of the men is presented for the ladies to experience in whatever manner they enjoy, provided their activities stay within the rules.   Generally speaking, women interested in the this type of CFNM gathering enjoy the eroticism of seeing and experiencing the naked bodies of men while concurrently knowing they will never have to reciprocate with any disrobing or sexual interaction.   Women are given the same ability to objectify nude males in the same way society has provided the reverse for men for centuries.   The comradery of a sisterhood among women of similar interests encourages them to openly acknowledge, embrace and share their voyeuristic and other interests in a way rarely done anywhere else in society.

The second  version, which evolved after the creation of the first, has its origins in the world of BDSM.    It focuses on the Female Dominant/male submissive dynamic typically abbreviated as "D/s" with the lower case "s" for the men designating subordination and/or inferiority.  For this variety, the CFNM acronym has evolved into "CFnm", which we use on this site for clarity and understanding.   Because some form of power exchange is present in all BDSM activities, the clothed-female/naked-male clothing protocol serves as an excellent means to establish gender hierarchy to facility that exchange.   In general, women that enjoy the CFnm version are less interested in the voyeuristic and prurient opportunities of being around nude men, but instead, find enjoyment in dominating the men with the purpose of the men's nudity being to emphasize the subordination of the male gender to the female gender while also intensifying the men's feelings of vulnerability and helplessness to the women.   Due to the many organized BDSM groups that have active gatherings, often referred to as "munches", CFnm has become the fastest growing segment of CFNM enthusiasts.  Within this community, the range of CFnm games and activities is as varied as the people enjoy BDSM.  Some gatherings are subdued whereby the naked men are there only to cater to the needs of the women serving them drinks, food or giving foot massages, but do not speak unless spoken to and never drawing attention to themselves.   Other CFnm parties are fully immersed into all the flavors of sadomasochism one can envision, including activities designed to cause varying levels of pain and psychological humiliation to the men to satiate both the sadistic desires of the women as well as the masochistic desires of the men.  

Not only are the type of activities markedly different between CFNM and CFnm, so are the people that enjoy one versus the other.    Activities and games for one are often considered highly inappropriate for the other.   Alternatively, there may be overlap wherein the interests of the women straddle both types thereby warranting activities normally associated with both versions.    Thus, it is important for those orchestrating CFNM parties to first determine what they want as well as the group of attendees they want to attract.

CFNM Tea Parties -  As discussed elsewhere, the very first orchestrated party that followed a CFNM dress protocol occurred prior to the creation of the term.   It was a tea party in San Francisco orchestrated by four renowned feminist authors.   Only women were invited as guests, but all service providers - including butlers, waiters, chefs, cocktail servers and photographers - were all men, who, other than bow-ties, cuffs and polished shoes, were required to be completely naked for the duration of the party as they dutifully provided the ladies service.  CFNM tea parties fall more appropriate in the CFnm camp as the men maintain a lower-level standing of subservience, and must continually provide services politely and quickly to any lady that requests it.    Over time, CFnm tea parties, which are often party of local BDSM communities, have evolved into gatherings that require the men to be specially trained in deportment and protocol pertain to "high-tea" service.

Because of their pioneering history and highly developed needs and related activities, these parties deserve their own spotlight so we have provided a page dedicated exclusively to CFnm Tea Parties.

Maximize involvement

A good host of any party attempts to make sure party games and activities include everyone.    The job of the hostess is to keep an eye on every person to make sure she or he has the opportunity to interact.  Activities should be designed to by maximally inclusive for your guests.    If a specific game necessarily requires a limit on the contestants, teams instead of individuals can be formed and those left out can be judges.    Turns at playing should be taken.     What makes a good hostess a great one is that she can sense when someone is not participating due to shyness, and provides strong encouragement for them to more actively participate.    As discussed elsewhere, the hostess should also communicate what activities are planned in advance of the gathering and get feedback on their use.   If certain activities are beyond the comfort level of men coming, yet they decide to come anyway, those men must recognize they hold an obligation to both hostesses and female guests to not only actively participate, but to do so absent any objection.

Plan your space

Many activities require open space or a staging area.   Others may require certain furniture such as tables.  The party planners should contemplate in advance how their venue will meet the needs of planned activities.   In addition, sometimes equipment may be needed such as writing boards or charts, easels or places to tie rope so their usage should also be envisioned.    Proper placement of furniture and floor coverings should be done prior to the party.    And of course, given the male nudity, considerations for hygiene should include the presence of towels to sit on or to clean any soiled areas.  

Orient activities towards female interests

Source of party ideas (women only, please).   Getting and maintaining a proper ratio of female attendees is the hardest aspect of hosting any CFNM party.   All activities should be designed around what would provide the greatest interest of those prospective women you are targeting for your event.  But what women and men may want to experience is typically be very different.  In accordance with the reasoning set forth in the Female-First Doctrine, we are only including on this website those CFNM party games and activities that women have expressed an interest.   These women have either actually hosted parties with these activities, or, have communicated to us they are activities they would like to see conducted.   To ascertain the popularity of certain CFNM games among women, we utilized our CFNM Village Survey.   Although many men have suggested activities, we find that they often lean towards only satiating the men's own fantasies as opposed to what women want, and are typically beyond the ladies' comfort levels.  Even the discussion of such male-oriented activities may result in dissuading women from attending their first CFNM gathering due to fear they might actually occur.

Given this, regardless of how "edgy" some of these games presented herein may be, rest assured that they all emanate from the desires and expectations of women that have submitted them to us.  Provided the hostesses and ladies attending the event desire to have feature them, all may be considered official CFNM party games and perfectly appropriate for a CFNM, or, CFnm party as the case may be.

Consenting Adults Only

No woman or man should every be pressured into doing something that exceeds their comfort zone, and all are cautioned to rely upon their own judgement when engaging in these activities.   It is imperative that those hosting the parties clearly communicate the type of activities that will occur in advance.   For the women attending, if there are activities that are beyond your comfort level, or, would dissuade you from attending, she should communicate those concerns to the planners - there's a good chance she is not the only one with those concerns.  For the men attending, if there are activities communicated in advance that are beyond their comfort level, they can certainly voice their concern to the planners, but if the activities cannot be altered, then their only option is to politely pass on the invitation. However, once a man attends, it is viewed implicitly that he consents and is then compelled to participate in whatever games and activities are conducted.  Men that come to events knowing what will occur then seek to alter the activities are not only violating protocol, but are souring the event for everyone.  But when he attends and participates, even when the activity stretches his comfort level or perhaps embarrasses him, he should view the activity as an opportunity to prove to the ladies he fully embraces the Female-First Doctrine, and is putting their enjoyment above his own comfort level.  And that's the best way a man can thank those women for the opportunity to come, which makes it a win-win for both the women and men.


Party Game and Activity Ideas Separated Between "CFNM" and "CFnm"

Disclaimer:   In an effort to meet the diversity of interests in these type of activities, we have attempted to be all-inclusive and comprehensive on the subject matter and are including most of the CFNM activities suggested to us.   We do so absent any judgement from us about those that enjoy them.   All are provided strictly for educational purpose, and we do not recommend or endorse any specific one nor are we implying the safeness of any of them.   As with anything that could result in injury, we recommend using your common sense and evaluating the risks prior to engaging in them as we do not take any responsibility for activities beyond our control.

We appreciate contributions of any activity ideas not featured herein. Please submit them to

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